STRUGGLES OF A SOCIALLY AWKWARD INTROVERT.

JUNE 9, 2017MARLEANA BRYANT4 COMMENTSEDIT

Being a social introvert does have some perks to it. Sure, having alone time is great, and not being pressured to attend excessively, loud and crowded gatherings and events is a plus as well… But when you stop and realize that you’ve only acquainted approximately 3 and a half people out of nearly 7.5 billion, and even then,you only speak to one of the three on occasion; you might say to yourself:

Oh my God I think it’s time for me to make some new friends.

I have recently had this epiphany. As a social introvert myself, social scenes can be an absolute nightmare.

So many people, each with their own personality, thoughts, and opinions. Who wants to deal with them all? What should I say, how should I act, what if no one likes me, are very real fears of a social introvert.

I have never been a cool kid; growing up I was the exact opposite. I could never fit in.

I wore weird clothes, matched with awkwardly colored shaped hats, listened to strange music, read lots of books, and kept to myself. I guess my weird appearance gave me an excuse to be a loner, and in turn made me into the social introvert that I am today.

Usually I dread even the simplest of everyday social activities such as going to the market or taking my kids to the park.  Even crossing the threshold of my own door can sometimes cause an irrational anxiety and fear to bubble up inside me.

Oh, and dear God, don’t let the door bell ring. I can’t imagine what foul and repulsive soul would have the audacity to appear outside my home and summon me from my reclusive activities. I was just fine in my own world, quite possibly on a planet in a whole different galaxy.

Yes I would love to imagine that I’ve made great strides with my anxiety, since my awkward adolescent years, but I’ve realized I’ve only managed to subtly subdue my social fears at most, for certain social events when needed.

I have often wondered, if I will ever over come my social anxiety. I mean sure this must be unnatural, and unhealthy for the average human being but social anxiety is an issue that we really  don’t see.

With our TVs, laptops, smart phones and other handheld devices encouraging more and more screen time and less interaction; social introverts are definitely on the rise. And while this may not necessarily be a deplorable case  in my eyes, or the minds of fellow introverts; it does leave one to ponder what a futuristic society would be like if we had all morphed into antisocial introverts.

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What are your thoughts on technology and the rise of social introverts. Do you believe this to be true? Are you perhaps an introvert too?

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DOMESTIC ABUSE: The Painful Truth About Domestic Abuse, and Violence. (2019)

Domestic abuse Exposed
Disclaimer: This image is not meant to portray any persons accused of Domestic Abuse

“The true character of a man is not defined by what he does in front of a crowd, but instead by what he does when no one else is around.”

-Unknown.

The shocking truth is 1 in 4 women will experience some form of domestic abuse or domestic violence in their life time, with most domestic occurrences happening to women between the ages of 18-34.

Although there are an estimated 12 million cases of domestic abuse a year, less than half are actually reported to authorities.

It’s extremely important that women (or men) who may be subject to this kind of abuse alert someone about their situation, even if it’s a family member, friend, police or agency, someone should know.

You should never feel alone, trapped or helpless when facing domestic abuse, most partners who are abusive tend to escalate, or continue abuse because they feel that their victim is estranged from friends and family

If you or someone you know may be suffering from abuse make a police report, or contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline. at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

A Man Who is Not A Man; A Short Verse

I know a man who is not a man, but a liar who never keeps his word.

Whose mouth proclaims his love, and threatens my life like a two edged sword.

I know a man who is not a man, who’d rather make excuses than to try.

I know a man who is not a man who believes all his twisted lies.

I know a man who is not a man who’d take my last without batting an eye,

He believes raising hands to me can be justified.

I know a man who is not a man who has no self control, no morals or, no goals.

Someone who believes he’s entitled because he exists,

he believes he can solve his problems by how well he can use his fists.

The problem with this man is that he is not a man at all.

 So I know a man who is not a man, he’s actually is just a boy.

I wrote this verse a little over a month ago, BEFORE deciding that maybe posting a verse revealing the true nature of my children’s father would be a little bit harsh. You are reading this because he changed my mind.

In the past week alone he has shown up outside my door and at our neighborhood park shouting and threatening to shoot me and kill me in front of our children for not answering the phone when he called.

I do not understand how a man can behave this way toward a woman that has mothered his children.

Are you a survivor or know someone who is a survivor of domestic abuse. What are your thoughts on the issue? What did you do, what actions are you taking to protect yourself?

Disclaimer: the photo above is not meant to portray an individual/s accused of or associated with Domestic abuse or violence.

Don’t forget to Follow me on Instagram @real.queens.killing.it Want to know a little more about me, check out this post here

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